Don’t seek perfection from everyone. Bring people closer to good in proportion to how far they are from it, for the one far from it is not the same as the one near it. This is not considered disorder in you, rather it is the very essence of wisdom.
لا تطلب الكمال من كل أحد، قرّب الناس إلى الخير بمقدار بعدهم عنه، فليس البعيد عنه كالقريب منه، فهذا ليس من الاضطراب فيك بل هو عين الحكمة
Muhammad Al-Baaqir said to his son,
يابني ! إن الله خبأ ثلاثة أشياء في ثلاثة : – خبأ رضاه في طاعته، فلا تَحْقِرَنَّ شيئًا من الطاعة؛ فلعل رضاه فيه. – وخبأ سخطه في معصيته؛ فلا تحقرن شيئًا من المعاصي؛ فلعل سخطه فيه. – وخبأ أولياءه في خلقه، فلا تحقرن أحدًا من خلقه؛ فلعله فى ذلك
“My son, Allah has hidden three things within three things:
(1) He has hidden His pleasure within good deeds, and so do not belittle any act of goodness, for His acceptance may be in it.
(2) And He has hidden His anger within sins, and so do not belittle any sin, for His anger may be in it
(3) And He has hidden His allies within His creation, and so do not belittle any person, for he may be one of them.”
This is how Muslims raise their children.
What example are you setting?
You can attract people to evil through gentleness more than you can attract them to good through harshness, and even if they are convinced [to do the good], they would hate doing it. He ﷺ said, “Whoever is deprived of gentleness is, in fact, deprived of all good.”
يستطيع الإنسان جذب الناس بالرفق إلى الشر، أكثر من جذبهم بالفظاظة إلى الخير، ولو اقتنعوا كرهوا العمل به قال ﷺ (من يُحرم الرفق يحرم الخير كله
The Bond Between Husband and Wife is from the Most Hated Affairs of Shaytaan
Narrated Jabir (radhiAllaahu ‘anhu) that Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) said:
“Iblees places his throne upon water; he then sends detachments (for creating dissension); the nearer to him in rank are those who are most notorious in creating dissension. One of them comes and says: I did so and so. And he says: You have done nothing. Then one amongst them comes and says: I did not spare so and so until I sowed the seed of discord between a husband and a wife. The Satan goes near him and says: You have done well. A’mash said: He then embraces him.”
[Saheeh Muslim. Number 2813]
Showing mercy to created beings is among the greatest means of being forgiven. Allah forgave a prostitute who quenched the thirst of a dog; so how about showing mercy to the weak, and giving relief to the distressed and victory to the oppressed of human beings?
رحمة الخلق من أعظم أسباب المغفرة، فقد غفر الله لبغِيٍّ سقت كلباً، فكيف برحمة الضعيف وإغاثة الملهوف ونصرة المظلوم من البشر